when you thought you are fragile, you discovered that your heart had an armor

why izit women emotions are very much influenced by their hormones? i for once like to blame other factors as my source of unexplainable tantrums and outbursts. can i say i'm angry bcoz of global warming?or maybe i'll tell the poor soul who i snapped at juz now that it was simply bcoz she's there dat makes me feel irritated. however, nothing beats like an apology dat sounds like this, "sorry i bit your head off...PMS lah today..." you actually can get away with it. hah!

by d way, life threw an unexpected surprise. i met the guy who caused a rift between a girlfriend and me few years ago. and this friendship i once consider very dear. we didn't hang out together anymore after that. during dat time, a lot of well-meaning friends told me dat i should forgive her but i just couldn't. i did try to swallow my pride and reach out to her but she shrugged my good intentions away. it's true...those dat you really care will hurt you the most. i've been wondering all these years what will i feel if i meet him again? will my anger to him still the same as few years back? what should i say to him? how should i act? i surprised myself because i handled the meeting well. i looked at him and tried to find the resentment i thought i still had in my heart but i found nothing. does this mean i've already forgiven him? forgiven her? maybe. i think it's just dat she is not an important person to me anymore. i've already moved on.

walau weh...i'm really proud of myself. *pat..pat*

for now i'll focus on the relationships i have. put more effort on maintaining them. no use to linger on the past. after living this long i think i can differentiate between true friends or not. besides, true friends will always tolerate my unstable hormones...right?right?